It may be warm in Austin today, but if it’s chilly where you live, you can still try this outfit with fleece lined tights + a big coat.
I’ve started this post about a dozen times, but I just can’t figure out how to put a bear hug into words.
To each and every one of you who joined the conversation on Friday’s post:
Thank you.
Your words on Friday taught me something:
It doesn’t matter if it’s an email to a coworker, a text to a friend, or a comment on a blog — eventually our words reach a living, breathing human being.
Words are strangely powerful. They can make people feel understood — which, I think, is quite possibly the most precious gift we can ever give or receive.
Can you remember a time when you felt wholly understood? You shared something deeply significant … and someone reflected it right back to you, like, “Hey … I get you.” You felt seen. You felt safe. It’s a beautiful thing.
You did that for me on Friday.
I wasn’t sure how Friday’s post would go over. I was resolved … but deep down I was nervous to share my true thoughts.
But you got it. You reflected it right back to me.
And It moved me. Just ask my husband. I was all kinds of emotional on Friday.
I think — especially on the internet — that it’s easy to forget the power of our words. Like maybe they don’t matter that much. Like no one is really paying attention. So does it really matter what we say?
It does. To the human being on the other side of the screen, it matters every time.
Thank you.
*Bear hug*
Hat: Urban Outfitters
Cardigan: Madewell
Dress: J.Crew Factory (similar)
Bag: Marc Jacobs
Shoes: Kenneth Cole
Necklace: Moulton
Okay. More style talk next time, promise.
xo
I love this dress on you. Especially because it’s got that defined waistline. Beautiful! And I can really relate to that incredible feeling of just being understood. I had one of those super emotional days last week too and it felt so good to know that someone knew exactly what was up.
I loved Friday’s post because it made you seem even more real and like us, your followers. While I’m sure we all don’t mind when you collaborate, its great that you so quickly recognized and were able to put into words that that experience didn’t suit you for the future. I immediately wanted to comment and say thank you for staying focused on the way you want to present your blog and content. I love this blog. Kate from Allthesmalltingsblog turned me on to you and I have loved it ever since. Thanks for being real with us!
Get ready, it’s going to get cooooolllddd in Texas (Dallas/Austin/Houston) by the end of the week!
You look so cozy and adorable! I am on the lookout for a dress that is as comfy and versatile as your striped one!
I loved your honesty in Friday’s post! Only a few hours before reading your post, I completely gutted my closet and took out about 200 pieces to get down to my capsule wardrobe. It felt incredibly freeing, but I was a little nervous about having so fewer options until I read your post later that night. The fact that you’re sticking to your guns and not foregoing your message for cute freebies made me feel more confident about having just ditched the majority of my clothes. Now every time I look at my wardrobe, I’m confident because I know I’m not the only one doing it and that you don’t have a second closet of goodies hiding from the camera. ;) Thank you so much for your amazing style advice, and for sticking to the heart of the blog!
friday’s post was so honest+ sincere+ true + inspiring that i was practically at a loss for words and when i saw how many comments you already had (and after reading most) i figured there wasn’t much more i could write that other hadn’t already written. but then with today’s “repeat” of sentiments and the revelation that yes! words do matter! i am commenting today to say thank you and HIGH FIVE! you’re awesome.
You are such a sweetheart & it shows in your writing. I think everyone wants to be loved & accepted for who they are- so nice to feel understood. I love that you put it all out there & don’t half-ass anything. Keep doing what you’re doin!
Put all your eggs in one basket. If you aren’t sure what you want, the universe isn’t going to help you get it.
Hi Caroline,
I’ve only just read the other post and have to agree with all the comments—your blog is definitely a breath of fresh air. I love your candor, sense of style and positive attitude.
One of the comments I saw touched a bit on supporting local businesses and that is something I feel pretty strongly about too. Not just local, but also ethical. This is your blog and you, of course, are the only one who can make decisions about how and what you buy. As a reader and an aspiring minimalist myself, I feel that conscious consuming really goes hand in hand with the process of paring down one’s closet and buying carefully. When we’re shopping impulsively and frequently, it’s so much easier to buy things that don’t necessarily meet our core values (such as supporting fair wage workers, sustainable fabrics, etc…), but when we’re planning and only buying a few core pieces for a capsule, it’s much easier to take these other factors into account. I’ve seen you note many times the importance of the quality of pieces, but where they come from/how they’re made hasn’t yet been an angle you’ve taken, and I’d really LOVE to see this blog take that direction a bit, too.
I know that most of us, realistically, spend our money in lots of different places which represent our values to varying degrees. If we’re purchasing something trendy and fun (say, that buffalo check hat) it’s understandable that we wouldn’t want to really invest too much in it. I’d really love to see you incorporate ethically sourced pieces into your wardrobe in future capsules. I respect that you use your blog to show what YOU wear, and when you provide links to products, they are things that you actually wear. I feel like things can only become more positive if you inspire people to shop brands that are both quality AND ethically vetted.
Small personal side story—I worked at Zara a few years ago as a sales associate (NYC Flagship) and thought that the company was so, so unprofessional and treated its employees with no dignity or respect—and this was in the US in retail, so I can only imagine how their producers in less regulated countries are treated. The founder and primary share holder of Zara is the third richest man in the world. It’s been three years and it still grinds my gears when I think about it. I have honestly not stepped foot in one of their stores since and I cringe a little every time I see them mentioned on a fashion blog (I’m sure other sales workers have similar retail PTSD). It definitely left me with a bad taste in my mouth regarding “fast fashion” and what affordable REALLY means (who is covering those costs?).
I really enjoy your blog and what you’re doing, so even if that isn’t something you want to discuss or tackle, I understand and I would still support your blog and continue reading. It’s just something that I’ve often thought about as I followed along, so I felt like maybe I should share. Apologizes for preachiness ;)
I’m really grateful that you brought this ethically sourced topic up. It is something that I am struggling with. I would love to swap everything to a brand that is ethically sourced (I would even love to take things that are local to support my community!) but I have a hard time finding things that fit me properly from big corporations, let alone local shops. In the end, I have learned to pick my battles. I will do everything I can to make the necessary changes (organic foods, local groceries, etc) but I try not to beat myself up over ethically sourced clothing + chemical free makeup (I have found one brand that can match my skin tone). If anyone has recommendations for quality ethical clothing, PLEASE let me know. I’m very open minded with different ideas and options :)
Oh, and I think it’s tough to bring thing topic up without sounding ‘preachy’ so kudos to you for having the courage and being kind about it, Joanna :)
Thank you, Tania!
One of the reasons I’d love to see a blog like Unfancy take on this subject is that it definitely can be challenging to find products that meet those standards—how great would it be to have Unfancy as a resource for finding them?
And I agree about picking your battles—it is a full time job making sure everything we wear/consume/use is organic, fair trade, etc!
Some ethical brands I like are:
Everlane (for clothes), Cuyana (women’s clothes and bags), Mitscoots (Socks), PACT (for underwear and socks), LL Bean (not all, but many products are made in the USA), Annie Greenabelle (women’s clothes) and People Tree (clothes), The latter two are UK based brands. I also like shopping at local boutiques and looking for things that are made in the USA. I’ve been wanting an Elsa and Me dress for a while but it is out of my price range.
Also, a few days ago Faribault, a woolen mill in Minnesota released a collaboration with Target and is selling some scarves, bags and blankets at Target stores—affordable prices and made in the USA! They’re also releasing a TOMS collab on Wednesday! Target is rarely a place I’d go to for ethical products, but I am really excited about these collaborations and I hope they continue to bring USA made and ethical products to their stores at affordable prices.
I would also love to know any and all ethical brand recommendations you and other readers have!
Oh oh and The Reformation and In God We Trust. They’re both pricey but have good sales!
Here is a small rant (that turns into a positive!), and PLEASE know it’s not directed to either of you. The first time I read about Everlane on a blog, I was so excited and quickly signed up on their website. Then I saw their size chart. Size large is 8-10. Are they only making clothes for models? This is in no way meant to be negative towards anyone’s size, but it depressed me, and I unsubscribed. Even at my goal weight, I will have big boobs, and trust me, I’m NOT bragging. It would be so much easier to shop without trying to fit these melons into a button down shirt. I know there are way more options now for ladies of all sizes, but this still bums me out.
As I’ve worked this past year (and am still working) on getting healthy. I was always putting off getting new clothes and new bras… until I lost weight. So many of us do this. And I finally realized I was shaming myself, and I didn’t feel worthy of nice clothes or new bras. I wouldn’t treat my girlfriends this way, so why did I treat myself this way? Bad bras are the worst. So one weekend I bought 4 new bras. HOORAY! I felt so much better, and my clothes fit better. And then I worked on making my first capsule. I put my investment money in shoes and accessories, and bought some basics at Old Navy, and mixed them with some Antro and Nordies items I have. I feel so much better treating myself as worthy of style, even (especially) as I work on losing weight. I’m sure I’m not the only one who needs to hear this. So if you are feeling unworthy, STOP and treat yourself like you treat your best girlfriends. You are worth it! And when you see a skinny girl pull of a look that won’t work for you, think about how to make it your own. We can do this! xoxo
*I didn’t mean to preach either ;-)
First, to Caroline, I’ve been reading your blog for several months, but haven’t commented. I was going to comment on the last post, but saw how many comments there were already and thought I had nothing to add. But after your post today, I just want to say that I really respect your decision not to accept freebies because it doesn’t fit with the whole concept of your blog. I have stopped following several blogs that went this route because they lost their authenticity. I know how much work blogging is, though, and I do feel you have every right to be compensated, it just needs to be in a way that makes sense for you and your readers. Your affiliate links seem like a great idea, and any products (like books or guides) that you might put out in the future would be a great fit. I know I would purchase something like that. Your blog is a breath of fresh air – keep up the awesome work!
As to this discussion here, I just wanted to add another option: sewing! I know it’s not for everyone, but I want to share my experience since it solves all of the above problems. I can buy organic cotton fabric for less than the cost of an average regular t-shirt, which brings the price to within my budget, plus no deplorable sweatshop conditions to worry about. Store-bought clothing fits 1 out of 1000 people perfectly off the rack, so the vast majority of us have fitting problems to varying degrees (my biggest was having a long torso, so dress waistlines often fell right below my bust – not flattering!). Sewing allows you to make clothing to fit your unique body, and not have to try to fit the standard sizes and shapes. Our differences are what make us beautiful and should not be a cause for shame. Sewing also allows you to make any style you like so you don’t have to follow trends unless you want to – this is so liberating! I’ve only been sewing for a year and a half, so I’m still developing my skills and figuring out my style, but that’s all part of the slow, thoughtful wardrobe-building process for me, and I really enjoy it. There’s also an amazing sewing community online where you can learn everything there is to know, and the people are all super helpful, supportive, and inspiring. Just another option for any of you with a crafty inclination :)
I just have to say, I’m totally girl crushing on you! I stumbled across your blog last week and fell in love with your ideas, style, and minimalistic adventures. So much so, that I spent the weekend overhauling my own wardrobe, packing almost everything away and creating my own Fall capsule to dress from. It’s SO exciting! Oh, but wait, there’s more……I did the same with my 3 children as well. They are SO happy to have such a tidy, organized wardobe now. I’m also shouting joyful accolades to how much simplier my laundry will now become!
You seem like such a sweet and honest individual, and in the world of the interwebs, it can be hard to find. Keep on keepin’ on! You’ve definitely inspired me!
Cheers.
:)
I rarely take the time to comment on a blog, although I read several. Your blog is so much more than just style, it’s spiritual. You bring a positivism to your work (and to the world of fashion) that is rare. Although I have a completely different lifestyle and body type, I still feel myself represented in your posts, and I can truly say that you have made me consider not just what I wear, but how I interact with others on a daily basis. Keep up the amazing work, and thank you for the doses of hope/compassion/honesty and authenticity.
It is so easy to think that our words get lost in the black hole of the internet, but even if no one is reading, there is no reason not to stick to your own truth and what keeps you clear. But of course, the community that is there is beautiful – keep on doing what you love – you are an inspiration!
hillary // http://www.journaldejalune.com/
Oh my goodness I have worn this exact outfit except with tights and a coat (UK weather its well into winter now). The versatile striped dress is a must and in my capsule wardrobe it has definitely been a must. I have a 32 piece capsule wardrobe and I have never been happier. I follow your blog religiously and to be honest its the only blog I follow because you are so genuine and believable. Unlike some others out there! Keep up the great work. Plenty of love in the UK for you!
Love. Stripes are a weakness of mine. Glad to see that I am not the only one. The good vibes here are almost more important than the style (I personally think good vibes will get you excellent style any day) so gush away. I am just glad that I am not the only one who feels that putting the positive out into the world is worth exploring in our communities (blog or otherwise). We are definitely paying attention and we love the message!
I bought that sweater last week but it is back-ordered :(. I’m glad to know it is as cute as I thought it would be though!
I started reading this blog because I love clothes, fashion, and simplifying my life. I’ve stayed because I’ve realized that not only do I get a daily dose of fashion, but I also get a daily dose of positivity. What you’ve created here is a lovely little bubble of positive in an internet full of negative. Every time you invite us to speak about the good in our lives and to congratulate you on the good in yours, you make all of our lives just a little nicer. You’re honesty in everything and you’re great attitude are what make this blog, and I sincerely hope you’ll always keep writing it.
I’m particularly hung up right now on your article from way back in April about Contentment. http://www.un-fancy.com/2014/04/
*your great attitude :P
Seriously? We are supposed to think you are genuine because you write up a post full of gushing adjectives and *bear hugs*? I’m sorry – and I may be one of the few who feel this way – but I don’t think this is genuine at all. I think that you are incredibly full of yourself and think you are some capsule-wardrobe-god who should be worshiped, when any number of women could think to put together a chambray shirt with black jeans and not have to write a blog post about it because they realize how basic it is.
The fact that you have communicated to your readers that you not accepting freebies, but are “partnering” with companies doesn’t let you off the hook or make you different from any other fashion blogger out there – you’re still making money from them and you are still advertising a specific company’s products. Don’t make it out to be something sooo ethical and don’t pretend to be full of integrity. It’s still business, so don’t try to shill it as anything else. That is disgusting to me. Call it for what it is instead of trying to re-word everything to make it look better.
Also, I am disappointed that you used the same form letter to reject guest blogger entries. Really? You couldn’t take the time to type up something that was – wait for it – more genuine? Come on! If I’d gotten that kind of response after putting in an application, I would think to myself that you were just trying to make me feel worse about not being a part of something WAAAY more special than I even thought it was to begin with!
I just think there is so much more to life than living it through the internet and trying to portray yourself through your blog as who you wish you were in real life. I hope you’ll take the time to read this comment (although I can’t imagine something this critical would ever be made a public comment) and take time to really think about what you are doing and how you are coming across.
Hannah,
Wow.
Caroline is too sweet and promotes positivity on her blog. On the other hand, I don’t like when people get attacked unprovoked. So I am intervening.
1. You do realize you come across as a petulant child that is mad for not being chosen in her guest blogger contest, right? Do you realize this? I don’t know what her rejection response is but I am very sure she isn’t mean about it. If you were that sensitive to rejection, you shouldn’t have applied. Caroline received 200 applications FOR A BLOG. No payments. IT’S A BLOG. This is her having fun in her blog and her wanting to expand because us commenters want more. You act as if you missed the job of a lifetime. THAT is on you. I am not even dumb enough to think that she will personalize every rejection letter.
2. If you think ‘there is much more to life than living it through the internet’, then why is your comment saying otherwise? Seems to me that you are PISSED OFF that you didn’t get in on something you really want and trying to talk yourself into believing you don’t care while insulting others in the process.
3. Caroline has never claimed to have invented the Capsule Wardrobe. Do you even read her posts? It’s all about finding what works FOR YOU. She loves minimalism (which is why her outfits are so simple) but she never claimed to be a fashion guru. You don’t like it? Start your own damn blog and see how popular you are. Unfancy skyrocketed for a reason. It is relatable. Oh but wait, you’re too busy pining for Unfancy because secretly you really like it and want to be a part of it SO BAD.
4. It seems that you didn’t read her post completely. She said she would partner with those that she would buy in her accord. If she likes something and would pay for it, why WOULDN’T she talk it up? AND WTF IS WRONG WITH MAKING MONEY FROM HER BLOG? There is a LOT of work going into this blog. Writing posts is easy, but to put together outfits, set up the background and lighting for shots, take the shots, and do additional post production? Are you even able to comprehend how much time that takes??
5. Her gushing is just her being emotional because she received kind words. That happens to everyone with a heart. Someone says something nice to you = your day brightens. Over 100 people say something nice to you = YOU EXPLODE WITH EMOTION, YOU HEARTLESS BEING.
With love – Tania
This is obvious reasoning as to why you weren’t chosen to be a guest blogger. Someone who is genuinely kind hearted, wouldn’t stoop to low levels of trash talking in comments about how horrible the place is that she applied to. Sounds like you are simply hurt over not being picked, and thus lashing out.
I feel sorry that you feel that way, but I have found this blog to be insightful, creative, and highly enjoyable. I could say the same about all of the others who enjoy this blog on a regular basis as well.
Cheers.
Hi Hannah,
It sounds like my ideas, my communication style, and my existence have upset you.
I’m sorry to hear that — I certainly never want to stir up anger or angst for anyone.
And I get it — it’s hard to tell if people are being genuine online. I could protest and try to convince you that I’m doing my best, but it sounds like you’ve already made up your mind about me.
The good news is that I’m not the only blogger in the world.
There are hundreds + thousands of other people out there, sharing ideas and striving to be helpful — just like me, but differently.
I trust that you’ll find somebody else whose worldview resonates more strongly with your own.
Sending love, for the journey …
Caroline
P.S. If you’re interested, I’ll clarify:
– My sidebar states that I get commission from affiliate links, so it’s obvious that I’m not hiding the fact that I’m making money or running a business. However, I believe business can be done with ethics + integrity. So I’m approaching freebies + making money in a way that’s aligned with my values. Promoting clothes because I got them for free isn’t aligned. But you know what is aligned? Choosing to buy the clothes I wear myself, without the influence of retailers. This puts me in control of the items I share — not retailers.
– You know what was important to me? To actually respond to each person, individually, and let them know that I appreciated them and the tremendous amount of care they put into their guest blogger application. I hope you’ll understand that, being a human being with finite energy, creativity, and time, it would be next to impossible to come up with over 200 unique ways to express that. So I put my heart into drafting an email that I could send to each person, along with some serious love.
– I appreciate your suggestion about taking time to really think about what I’m doing and how I come across. I like reflecting and being thoughtful about the life I’m living. I’ll do that.
Hannah,
Wow.
Caroline is too sweet and promotes positivity on her blog. On the other hand, I don’t like when people get attacked unprovoked. So I am intervening.
1. You do realize you come across as a petulant child that is mad for not being chosen in her guest blogger contest, right? Do you realize this? I don’t know what her rejection response is but I am very sure she isn’t mean about it. If you were that sensitive to rejection, you shouldn’t have applied. Caroline received 200 applications FOR A BLOG. No payments. IT’S A BLOG. This is her having fun in her blog and her wanting to expand because us commenters want more. You act as if you missed the job of a lifetime. THAT is on you. I am not even dumb enough to think that she will personalize every rejection letter.
2. If you think ‘there is much more to life than living it through the internet’, then why is your comment saying otherwise? Seems to me that you are PISSED OFF that you didn’t get in on something you really want and trying to talk yourself into believing you don’t care while insulting others in the process.
3. Caroline has never claimed to have invented the Capsule Wardrobe. Do you even read her posts? It’s all about finding what works FOR YOU. She loves minimalism (which is why her outfits are so simple) but she never claimed to be a fashion guru. You don’t like it? Start your own damn blog and see how popular you are. Unfancy skyrocketed for a reason. It is relatable. Oh but wait, you’re too busy pining for Unfancy because secretly you really like it and want to be a part of it SO BAD.
4. It seems that you didn’t read her post completely. She said she would partner with those that she would buy in her accord. If she likes something and would pay for it, why WOULDN’T she talk it up? AND WTF IS WRONG WITH MAKING MONEY FROM HER BLOG? There is a LOT of work going into this blog. Writing posts is easy, but to put together outfits, set up the background and lighting for shots, take the shots, and do additional post production? Are you even able to comprehend how much time that takes??
5. Her gushing is just her being emotional because she received kind words. That happens to everyone with a heart. Someone says something nice to you = your day brightens. Over 100 people say something nice to you = YOU EXPLODE WITH EMOTION, YOU HEARTLESS BEING.
With love – Tania