I probably wear this outfit — or something almost exactly like it — almost once a week these days. Those layers work well for the warm/cool fluctuations of spring.
The basic outfit recipe has three elements to it: skinny jeans + tee + long cardigan. Easy.
It’s worked for me in the past. It’s working for me right now. And that’s something to be excited about, especially as I’m trying to practice contentment with my wardrobe.
These past few weeks, I’ve had a hard time finding contentment. Something about springtime has me itching to buy new clothes like crazy.
But the other day, I realized something:
If I’m struggling to find contentment in one area, perhaps I should begin practicing it in another area.
Contentment breeds contentment.
It’s all connected. Contentment probably won’t become our resting pulse until we invite it into other areas of our lives. Over time, we can begin nurturing that bit of contentment with other things that create contentment. Maybe yoga. Maybe meditation. Maybe volunteering. Maybe church. Maybe reading a series of books.
Contentment is a journey. We can cultivate it in a new area, see where that leads, and then take the next step.
One step at a time.
So, two questions for you today: First, is there an outfit recipe that you’re repeating all the time these days? How long has it been a go-to outfit for you? And second, how do you cultivate contentment in your life? Do you find there are certain activities that foster contentment? I’d love to hear your perspective.
xo,
Photo Credit: Katie Jameson
Liked today’s outfit? You can shop it and support Unfancy at the same time by using these affiliate links:
01 | Tee by Everlane (made responsibly) | similar (under $20)
02 | Cardigan by Cuyana (made responsibly) | similar | similar (under $25)
03 | Black jeans (old by Joe’s Jeans) | similar (made responsibly) | similar (under $50)
04 | Flip flops (old by Clarks) | similar | similar | similar (made responsibly)
05 | Hat (old by Madewell) | similar
Contentment with my wardrobe is hard for me too, I also constantly want to update our space with new bedding or different decor. I always remind myself that if I’m feeling restless or strange it doesn’t have to do with the stuff around me but the stuff within me. I give myself some quiet time and my favorite cup of tea or I go outside with our pups- I take the time to remind myself that the outside stuff won’t ever change the inside. Thank you for your beautiful post, always wonderful to know I’m not alone!
This is wonderful. Wise words. Thank you
Bonnie, it’s such a wise way to look at things. No amount of stuff will create contentment, other than the temporary kind. :)
Contentment makes so much sense to me also in this context! Now wonder you like these kind of look already since a longer time: you look perfect in it!
xx from Bavaria/Germany, Rena
http://www.dressedwithsoul.com
Love that you stop and pause to think about the rooted issues of discontent. I’ve been learning recently that (biblical) contentment goes beyond just being satisfied with my own life, but also includes an open-handedness of my things both to God and others. Realizing that giving and being generous of my things/time/money/resources is a better antidote to feeling discontented than simply willing myself to be happier with what I have. Great conversation!
I agree with you halfheartedly.
Typo. I mean fullheartedly. lol
I agree with you too! When I feel discontent, I focus on my contentment in The Lord; He is my Inheritance! He’s so good! And then I thank Him for His gifts to me, and like you said, focus on giving to others.
Well said. God has designed us to find our full contentment in Him. Everything else, and I mean everything, will fall (way) short, and we wind up feeling disappointed. I think it may take years to learn this and appreciate it. Once we’ve exhausted all earthly and material resources, including human relationship – charming as they may be – we begin to realize that our relationship with Him is THE answer to all our discontent. And, nicely, then we find ourselves content with all that we have because we are not depending on clothes or houses or relationships or minimalism or anything else to fill the void.
Well said.
Unrelated to contentment, but your neutrals in this outfit are making me fall in love with warm neutrals again. I’ve been swearing off them for a while after a similar experience to your winter a few years ago where you realised you missed colour. Since then I’ve been too scared to go completely neutral. But the pendulum seems to be swinging back again. Thanks for the visual inspo :)
My outfit recipe –or “uniform”– ? Is skinny jeans and a j crew button up long sleeve shirt. I have several…. tucked in in the front and loose in the ack. They feel put-to-gether and polished. I can dress it up with heels or booties or nice flats or wear it with converse or flip flops. I can roll the sleeves when it’s hot. I can layer sweaters when it’s chilly.
Sounds cute and comfy, Schille! :)
A book called “the how of happiness” proved very useful in helping me hack myself to increase happiness/contentment. So I deliberately do the things that add to it.
Clothes? Knit pencil skirt, scarf/wrap, fitted knit tee, booties.
Hey Caroline – I hope you find your contentment!
Been feeling a bit itchy myself. I’ve been trying out a new workout plan to try to take my mind off my worries. Don’t know what it is about spring that tends to make me feel so stuck.
Sending good vibes and best wishes ???
Thanks Laura! Best to you too, during the weird Spring feels. :)
I love the simplicity and comfort you’ve got here while still looking well put together! Don’t laugh too hard, but my go to outfit for the last few months is skinny jeans, comfy tee, flannel, converse, and a hat. Sometimes when life gets crazy, you’ve just got to throw a hat on and rock that dirty hair, you know??
I feel like, for me, contentment comes from letting go. Listing out my priorities (on paper, because I am a neurotic list maker) and letting the small stuff fall off my radar helps me focus on the present and be content to just hang with the family and enjoy life.
Yes, I feel you Monica! :)
I find that one of the best ways to start feeling more grounded is to spend time outside. Walk in a park, breathe fresh air, go for a run, Plant flowers ? take a leisurely bike ride, enjoy nature/ creation around you.
I know there’s a drive thru safari in Texas, we went there when I was kid. Have you been there? I was thinking it would be a fun and different way to spend time outside, right in Texas. (And have a giraffe lick your face) I googled it and I think this is the place! http://www.wildliferanchtexas.com
God bless :)
Oh that sounds so fun! And I agree, time spent outside is very recharging. :)
Great questions! I would say that I love a good jersey dress- you can pair it with any shoe and it works!! I just bought my first one about a month ago and now that it’s spring I find it hard to change out of it.
Things that breed contentment, include anything where I’m comfortable and not thinking about my growing to do list.. something like reading, having a relaxing drink with my bf, laying on the beach.
https://thedianaedition.com
Love those versatile pieces, Diana… And your contentment list sounds dreamy! :)
My go to outfit is always leggings with a long loose top and either boots in the winter, trainers this time of year and flip flops in the spring
Year-round comfort! :)
What a wonderful thought for the day, timeless advice! Having a minimal amount of things can help with becoming content, because you learn to love the cleanliness and simplicity of only having the items you really use. I don’t live alone, so a minimalist environment can be hard to achieve but I do what I can!
A dress and a hat. I’ve been reaching for it most days. (Means I don’t have to do my hair ?).
It’s important to practice self compassion (grace) and not feel like you have to rush yourself out of your feelings. Sometimes you go through seasons where all you want to do is watch Netflix and eat carbs. If you know yourself (like you know that that is not charicteristic of you…not your resting pulse…) than I don’t think you have to worry that giving in a little. It sometimes is going to fundamentally change who you are. Sometimes just by giving yourself grace for your ‘funk’ helps you move out of it faster.
Grace aids self-contentment.
Agreed! I’m reading a book right now called Simplicity Parenting that describes the same sentiment. It discusses the concept of a ‘soul fever’, basically feeling off for some reason or overwhelmed by life (written regarding kids, but I think it applies perfectly to adults too) and how it should be treated the same way you would a physical fever – by suspending the usual craziness of life to rest and heal. And allowing yourself the grace to recognize that it’s okay to step back from the perpetual motion – always doing more, buying more, consuming more – that our society encourages.
What helps me to stay grounded and content are things that remind me of who I am and force me to slow down: looking at old photos, listening to music that reminds me of different periods in my life (John Mayer = college:) ), becoming absorbed in a good book like I did as a kid (The Goldfinch is intimidatingly long but excellent).
Fantastic advice, said in such a lovely way. Thanks, Jessica! :)
***should read, is not going to fundementally change who you are.
My go-to outfit is a pair of jeans and a white collared, button up shirt worn with or without a plain white or black t-shirt or tank top. It’s been my go to combination for decades. I remember the hubs asking me once why I was buying yet another white collared, button up shirt, how many did a woman need? Well, sleeveless, short sleeved and long sleeved so you can cuff them on the forearm or buttoned at the wrist, heavy chambray and light cotton, fitted and oversized, regular length and tunic length, dressy fabric and casual fabric, the linen one with the priest’s collar and pintucks and delicate white on white floral appliques on the belled sleeves…..lol! Many white shirts is the answer for me!
As to an activity that fosters contentment, mending does that for me. Whether it’s darning a hole in my favorite pair of socks, patching my son’s jeans, cutting the hub’s worn out khakis into shorts, fixing a hem, patching a tear on a sheet, putting binding on the fraying edge of a towel, taking in or letting out a seam on a garment to make it fit better….the list is endless. The contentment comes from extending the life of a thing, from not being wasteful, from having the skill to do the mending and not having to spend money to buy a new item. It’s contentment in knowing that I COULD buy something new but that I CHOOSE not to. Lol! It sounds a lot goofier written down than it did in my head!
This is exactly how I feel about black knit tops–tunic length, hip length, swing tee, the cute one with pintucks and cutwork, tulip slits, hi-low, long-sleeve wrap, short sleeve wrap… Many black tops is the answer for me! :))
And I’m loving all the discussion about contentment. This is one of the very few places where I always read the comments. Most sites/blogs the comments devolve into bashing and negativity, but never here. Thank you all!
The most amazing community! :)
It’s not stylish or eye catching, but I probably wear running shorts and a tee shirt (or a jersey knit shirt if I’m feeling spicy) with sandals and some sort of cardigan or sweater at least once a week. It’s a comfort thing, and what I gravitate towards when I’m sleepy or need some sort of self care but don’t have time to take a bath or something. I put on my comfy clothes that I feel good and cozy in, and even if they aren’t particularly stylish, I feel confident in them because I know its exactly what I want to be wearing.
As far as contentment goes, I love doing yoga and running, those are my two main physical outlets and remove so much stress from my life (less stress=easier contentment). Doing any kind of art helps too, it’s a great way for me to use my mind in a way I might not get the chance to do in my daily life, and gives the logical side of my brain a break. I always feel the good kind of tired after I make art too, the kind that comes from contentment with what I’ve accomplished.
All of that sounds great, Sydney! :)
Normally I’m pretty content, but occasionally the monster of want rears its ugly head. I tame the monster by doing one or more of the following list:
1. Gratitude Journal
2. Read/watch something about minimalism
3. Read/watch historical fiction about regular people (e.g. Little House rather than Downton Abbey). They had so little back then, I have nothing to complain about.
4. Spend time in nature. Observe the plants/animals, who only need food, water, and shelter.
As for my “uniform,” I’m in a transition phase, which is one reason I follow your blog.
So lovely. Thanks for sharing, Tarah! :)
Something I’ve discovered recently about myself is – whenever I feel the urge to start buying a bunch of new clothes, it’s because I want to see myself in a certain way (“cool”, “effortless”, etc.) What has helped me combat this feeling is just being active – whether it’s a hike or a full on work out. I think a lot of times, for me at least, I buy clothes because I want to look a certain way. Then I dig a little deeper and find that it’s because I want to FEEL a certain way. And that feeling doesn’t come from clothes, it comes from feeling content in my body.
Spot on, Lillian. :)
Jeans + tee + snikers and some layers like cardigans, jean jacket, leather jacket or a nice loose sweater. I love the loose and comfy layers that keep me warm and cozy.
No sandals here yet… even if weather is mostly 70 degrees, in the afternoons it gets chilly.
So…springtime you say…well, i lost my evenings with hot tea and cozy layers on the couch reading books because…spring.
Now I like chilling with my cats and boyfriend on the balcony (I moved the furniture there and added a couple of plants and it looks like a cozy patio) watching series or talking about things while sipping some wine. So, even it s spring, i find things that bring me joy and contentment every season.
In the summer I get the ichy feet and I like going out, a lot! Parks, nature, everywhere I can connect with my inner peace and feel the energy around me. You know…the good vibes.
Of course, nobody stops me if I want to get cozy and read on the couch but I feel the need to let this be my winter moments.
Sometimes, you find contentment in other things and they bring you joy as much as the old things you tempt to miss.
Thats good. When you will go shopping you will enjoy every minute of it!
It all sounds so nice, Andreea. :)
I too was feeling, I don’t know, blah? With a spring wardrobe. Upon reading your blog , I was taken with your choice of words…. contentment!!!! Yes, that is precisely the word I was looking for in my everyday clothes! Just using the word makes me actually SEE the pieces I want for spring!
Judi! It can be our mantra! :)
Going through something similar with shopping right now. I allowed myself to shop for some spring/summer clothes, but before I knew it I’d blown my monthly clothing budget through the whole summer…so no more shopping till fall! I decided I probably need to take a “capsule’-ish” (to borrow your phrase) approach to shopping. I noticed that shopping breeds more shopping, because in looking for one thing I come across other things I like or have been looking for. And browsing leads to buying. So lumping together several month’s worth of shopping budget and having a period of shopping (maybe not intensively, over say a month or so) and a period of no shopping may be best to remove that temptation!
That is so true, Alice! No doubt that shopping often just increases the temptations. :)
Oh how I love this and needed to hear it today! I’ve got the shopping bug too. I haven’t really noticed or connected this until now but the shopping bug does quiet down for a while when I feel like I’ve done a good job somewhere else in my life (cleaning the house, planting spring plants, my work). I think focusing on other creative pursuits is my way of finding contentment and I should work on that more! It’s like shopping is one way I’m creative or express myself. But there are plenty of other ways to do that! (Painting, pottery, making a fancy meal). Thanks for the idea!
Sounds like a great plan, Rebecca! :)
Hi Caroline, Working towards contentment is a very good idea.
I have noticed that buying new clothes is often the easiest way if you want some change in order to be content – but it does not last long. As an alternative one could simply combine an outfit with a different accessoire or try out a new hair style. Trying out new hobbies would be a second alternative and having a hobby you truly enjoy a third alternative.
I personally enjoy yoga and singing.
For clothes I tend to wear jeans with a t-shirt, a loose fit cardigan, a pair of comfy trainers and scarfs of course.
Lena
Those are great suggestions, Lena. :)
I don’t know if pants + shirt is too vague. But that’s been my go to since forever now. Recently, I’ve been choosing looser pants and shirts to go with the warmer weather, something a bit more breathable. I’m also trying to wear more neutral colors. For some reason, maybe as I am getting older the brightly colored clothing does not speak to me they way it use to.
With contentment though, it wasn’t until reading this post, did I realize that I’m not working on cultivating contentment. I’d like to say my blog, writing and photography make me content but I spend a lot of time thinking and ruminating on the things that cause me a lot of discontent. Thank you for this post, it has caused me to do some self reflection.
Caroline, I just love these posts from you.
I feel like I go through seasons where I struggle more with contentment than at other times.
Right now is one of those time where I am really struggling…
For me it’s work related, I have a new boss who doesn’t like me (she told me directly), and its just been hard. I want to feel better, and so I want to buy stuff that makes me momentarily happy.
Thanks for the great reminder…. I think I need to meditate more, make sure I am eating well (not treating myself too much/ emotionally eating), spending more time outside and with my loved ones.
I also plan on doing a NO shopping ban for the month of June, and probably July.
For me everything is also compounded by the fact that I am almost 6 months pregnant. Don’t have “enough” clothes to wear- even though I really do, lol.
Sorry for the rambling, felt good to share, this was just what I needed.
XO!
I feel your pain! My boss of over 30 years died I n February, so she n addition to facing eventual unemployment at an age when people aren’t pounding on my doorstep, I’m also trying to work with his Executor sister-in-law who treats me like a slave. Tough times.
Work situations like that are ROUGH. I hope it gets better and you’re able to find what we’re all after — contentment! :) Congrats on the pregnancy, Jodie!
Oh, contentment. I wish they would sell that in a bottle. Not really the point, but it would be nice =)
I’ve been feeling restless all year and I started to throw that restless energy into all those things that I wanted to do for a while. That includes fun things (like joining a book club) as well as all those nagging little tasks that don’t need to get done right now, but that weigh me down. Things like changing the lightbulb in the fridge give me a boost of energy and take a little of that restless feeling away.
My outfit formula is very similar to yours, Caroline: skinny jeans, sneakers, tee or long sleeved tee, plus a cardigan or loose sweater for extra warmth.
They would sure make a killing if they could bottle it up, don’t you think? ;) Love you list of little ways to get rid of restlessness, Maria. Thanks for sharing.
Oh yes, they would make a killing. But I guess, contentment only feels really good, if we truly find it in our lives, instead of getting addicted to drinking bottled up contentment every day … I can see me getting addicted to that. ;)
Hi Caroline,
I find that when I’m creating something, whether that be photography, a painting, a drawing, or writing a piece of fiction…all other avenues of my life want to pitch in and divert all those random sources of creative energy sprinkled throughout my life into whatever it is I’m working on…in my case, I usually long to dive head first into fiction. So, clothing and food, both things I usually love to show a little flair in, just sort of become a means to support the art. I become content with them being clean or simply warm. But life doesn’t just hand out opportunities for you to create, you gotta carve that time out and chase it down, which makes it even more special…So as long as I GET to create, there is contentment in that. and fyi, the above outfit is totally my go-to “I’m writing and can’t think about anything else, this looks awesome and it’s comfortable, therefore it’s good enough and I’m not going to waste another second thinking about it outfit.”
beautiful, simple musings. thank you.
my go-to outfit is distressed black jeans and a grey t. easy and comfy.
i work to find contentment in prayer. Jesus is an every-calming presence and helps set my navigation straight every time i rest in Him.
side question: how do you combat the see-through-ness of white t’s? i love the clean look, but wearing a cami in the summer is too hot for me and i can’t seem to find a white t that is not totally see-through!
Shannon, the see-through tee seems to be a very common problem. I usually just wear a nude bra and don’t have too much trouble with it. But I recently heard that this tee from Tradlands is completely opaque! Might want to give it a try. :)
Lovely post. I’m another who finds that gratitude is essential for contentment.
My go-to is bootcut or trouser jeans, a tee, and a long cardigan. In spring I’m moving to crops and a tee. I also love a knee length a-line skirt and a tee. Am I boring or content? I’m not always sure. :)
Haha, Kelly. I’m sure contentment has a little bit of boring in there, because it’s comforting. Definitely not a bad thing! :)
Hi, Caroline. Contentment, rather than fleeting happiness, is a noble pursuit for any of us. How we get there and how long we manage to maintain it is as individual as we each are.
On one level I am very content (i.e. my partner, our home, the neighborhood) and extraordinarily grateful. My husband had open-hear surgery five weeks ago. The outcome was the ideal we prayed for and he is recovering well.
Meanwhile, yesterday we had to drive an hour away to an emergency vet clinic (what?! why are there more such clinics in our part of Texas?!?!?!?) because of our orange cats developed a very painful urinary problem. Thankfully, the vet was able to help and with luck our baby will be coming home in one or two days. But the day was very long and stressful, costly, and my husband experienced his own pain during the extended trip. But again, I’m thankful for how well it is going so far.
On the other hand, I’ve apparently reached a point in life/career where my services are no longer wanted, regardless of my track record and abilities. I continue to try and wrap my brain around this one. That coupled with trying to understand how little people generally are actually willing to invest in friendship, I mean really invest. I witnessed it yet again before, during, and after my husband’s major surgery. Both my husband and I feel like we are continually adjusting (aka, lowering) our expectations…now virtually to nothing. As someone who has always highly valued friendship, this is a very difficult adjustment.
The point of my monologue is to say that contentment seems to a more complex, multi-layered state of being than I realized before. Overall, I do feel content and so grateful. Yet there are aspects of life that I thought I could take as given, like friendship, that I must find a way to accept will not be…at least as I wanted them to be.
I swear, Ardith, it’s true what they say — when it rains, it pours!! And it’s good that you can find contentment in the midst of it all. I feel like being stressed and being unhappy are two very different things, as long as we remember to be grateful for the good parts. The stress is temporary.
This really is one of your signature looks! {mine too!} I live in Portland, OR, and layers are a must in spring/fall! The simplicity of this style combined with its comfort and “cute” factor makes it such an easy go-to!
PS… I discovered you a couple months ago while researching fashion/style blogs and am loving your blog, content and well, you! I’m a personal stylist (side hustle/experiment!) and am pondering the idea of starting a blog and yours has been very helpful, as far as how often to post, content, structure, etc! I may be reaching out to talk to you more, possibly for coaching or mentoring! Thanks for your stylish contribution to the world!❤️?
Practicing gratitude for what I have leads me to feel content. After all, as the saying goes: if you aren’t happy with what you have, what makes you think you’ll be happy with more? At least I think that’s a saying…
Absolutely, Rosi! :)
I am at my most content wading in the river just outside my front door. Thank goodness it’s warming up and I can do that again! I love reading books, especially while swinging in a hammock. I also agree with the mending suggestion that someone made earlier in this thread. Even scrubbing some floors will put some gratitude in you (when you are done and can stop!). Sometimes a lack of contentment comes from being “too busy” vs “not busy enough.” It’s a sign you’re too busy with the wrong things!
Good point, Coral! :)
Oh contentment! Why is it that something so simple can feel like so much work??? As I’ve shared before, I’m struggling hard with contentment with my current living situation as hubs and I are working hard on saving up a down payment for a house. So often I find contentment when I let go of things. If I feel anxious about my appearance or clothing, I dial it back and allow myself to let go of whatever expectations I’m feeling. If I feel anxious about my living situation, I try to let go of my need for a beautiful space and remember that I’m delaying gratification. By living super frugally in a tiny, cheap, meh apartment now, we’ll be better equipped to find a home we love sooner.
Recently I’ve also been working toward some new goals…1) the challenge of optimizing my grocery shopping and reducing our monthly grocery bill while still cooking and eating – mostly – real food, and 2) I’ve been enjoying a couple of sewing projects. This weekend I refashioned two pairs of jeans, and last night I sewed up some pinch pleats in our winter duvet cover that had come undone. Hooray for fixing things up rather than replacing them!
When I let go of the things that are breeding discontent and replace them with positive energy toward a goal, it keeps me from focusing on the negatives in other areas.
Similar to what you’ve shown here, I’m still loving the jeans + tank + cardigan look. It’s just perfect for transition seasons! Totally guilty of wearing this combo right now.
https://everydayjoys.blog/
Wonderful and thoughtful response, as always, Anna! Thank you for your comments. :)
Haven’t been too content lately and I have the credit card bill to prov it. Adjustment time!
Jeans or yoga pants, tee, necklace or scarf. In fall/winter add a vest or cardigan.
Great style as always! Love how effortless you are <3
https://www.myblackcloset.com
Oh, this message is SO needed in my part of the universe! Thank you :)
Hi, Caroline!
My go to outfit recipe is jeans+tee+slip-on sneaks. I feel so confident and comfortable in a good pair of jeans and soft tee! For work, I dress it up with a flowy blouse and a pair of nice flats. I’m lucky enough to work in a creative environment that I can get away with jeans.
Meditating helps me cultivate contentment. I am able to center my thoughts and it brings me so much peace. I try and squeeze a 5 minute guided mediation into my daily routine, even if it means on the bus on the way to work!
Can’t wait to see your home tour! Wishing you the best :)
xo, EK
The home tour will be fun, Ela! :)
Great post
xx
The Pink Pineapple
New post:
http://thepinkpineappleblog.blogspot.com/
At TJMaxx I came across a cute little light gray skirt, kind of like a light-weight sweatpants material. It is straight, has pockets and side panels and falls just above the knee I’m a stickler for quality and this was beautifully made and only $16.99. So I bought two and live in them now. Florida didn’t really have a winter this year and it’s hot as blazes already, 99 degrees. These are great with any number of t-shirts but I also bought two tennis tops that fit just right (I need fitted or I look like a box). This is my summer uniform and it’s perfect for strolling the grandbaby. I also bought a darling white and tan striped knit skirt that flares but I need to find a couple of good white t-shirts to go with that. Happy.
Great message!
Lately I’ve realized that contentment in my wardrobe looks like: my most comfortable jeans + any top with an interesting drape + any comfy shoes that give me a little height.
That of course along with taking regular naps and spending at least 15 minutes a day technology & people-free :)
Well, I must admit, that sounds delightful. :)
I struggle a lot with my body shape and size. When I feel self-conscious, I want to shop for clothes because wearing something cute or flattering makes me feel good. But that’s not true contentment; it’s just a short time boost. I’ve found, through my yoga practice, that I’m building contentment with my body and my belonging. My body shape and size may not chance drastically, but my strength and flexibility grow and I become content with my progress and love for my body. No new clothes needed :) Love this post. Thank you.
We all have those doubts about ourselves and our appearnces at one time or another, Kelly. Thank you for sharing what is making you stronger! :)
Your posts are brilliant. Thanks for taking the time to discuss not only clothes and styling but why we do what we do. Love the idea about contentment.
Mandie
I agree completely that contentment in other areas of life can make the shopping itch go away – if you’ve just had a great weekend with friends e.g. you can’t be bothered so,much with clothes and shopping anymore. But that kind of distraction does not always work because there will always be times when you’re in a funk and there’s no ‘great’ experience at hand. Small things like reading a good book can foster contentment in me. But sometimes I just have to ‘move through’ the rough patch, allowing myself to feel the desire and discontent, journaling about it, moving back and forth between the shopping cart and self-reflection (meditation and yoga are great for that)… It’s a tough and time-consuming process for something as seemingly superficial as the desire to buy a blouse, but if I never did that I would buy way too,much and violate my own ethics regarding mindful consumerism… Also, learning to move through rough emotions without immediately trying to ‘fix’ them is always a good mindfulness practice :).
It was funny to read your post this morning. My guy and I *just* had a conversation about this the other night and it’s been on my mind. I’ve been trying to minimize my spending to pay down some pretty intimidating consumer debt. It’s been going well but he pointed out I’m always wishing for things. “I wish our bedroom was white. I wish we had an ottoman in the living room. I wish I had more time. I wish I could visit my dad more.” His point, like yours, was that the wishing for things is the same habit that got me into buying things I can’t afford. Until I nip that in the bud in a more complete way, I’m going to struggle. Smart guy.
Whew! Long comment. All that to say, thanks for your post : ) Go to outfit: Jeans, converse, graphic tee and a chambray shirt.
Hi! I’ve been always repeating my mom jeans with some tee, mostly to create something a little “dirty” and 90’s, with a rock band tee, or an elegant combination with turtlenecks. I really really love this combination, mostly with lovely black mules. It became my college uniform kkkkk I feel that it can be part of my style forever.
Recently I follows the rules of Marie Kondo to try to organize my space and my life in general, because I was feeling that it was running out of my control and I was unhappy, unmotivated and losing my creative moments.
The moment I finished the organization and looked around to my room was the last time that I filled the highest level of contentment I’ve been feeling in a really long time. I was grateful for all the awesome people of my life, the increadable things happened with me and mostly for my simple great little life. And it’s was enough.
My go-to outfits have been my Carhartt overalls with a white tee or Madewell skinny jeans with a self-made button up or striped tee. Maybe not the most creative, but life is busy with a four month old puppy…
As for contentment, sometimes I find that going for a walk and getting fresh air helps. Slowing down and having a cup of tea or practicing yoga is nice too.
when it’s cooler—
Boyfriend jeans + flowy button up / sweatshirt + white foam Birkenstocks or black sneakers
when it’s warmer—
colorful high waisted skirt + linen sleeveless button down tied at the bottom (I have like 5 from Uniqlo I’ve been wearing for years, some basic and some loud colors) + birkenstocks / colorful wedges if I’m feeling fancy
Also, similar to you I wear a pretty neutral color palette in the fall/winter, but I absolutely LOVE color in the spring and summer!
I’ve been thinking about contentment lately, too, and I came across this article: https://zenhabits.net/contentment/
The writer talks about learning to trust yourself more. I highly recommend it. Maybe if you look at other places in your life where you’ve succeeded you can trust yourself more with restraint at shopping?
This sermon really helped me tackle my discontentment. Even if you’re not Christian, I think you’ll find a lot of practical advice in this video: http://yourmove.is/episode/ep5-managing-your-expenses/
In the beginning of the video, the pastor says, “Awareness is what fuels discontentment. You are happy with what you have until you become aware that there’s another one.” And I think this is so true!
And at the end, he shares a great story on how his wife decided what to wear when they were invited to the National Prayer Service to pray for Barack Obama when he became president.
Great post! I feel less alone about this contentment problem :)
I’m finding contentment most when I hang out with my husband and we joke about everything and laugh – it’s the best! I found it the other day with a friend and her child and again it was spontaneous jokes that would arise in the moment.
Slowing down and not having an agenda of any sort really opens space for contentment I’ve noticed.
My outfit lately: jeans (straight leg or wide leg), tee or sleeveless shirt + open cardigan + sneakers or birkenstocks
Thanks again for sharing your journey with us!! :D